Underworld: Blood Wars – Movie Review – Sarcastard Reviews

Underworld: Blood Wars - Movie Review - Sarcastard Reviews


Underworld: Blood Wars - Movie Review - Sarcastard Reviews starring Kate Beckinsale, Charles Dance, and Theo James.

5th movie in the Underworld franchise. Kate Beckinsale's character has to protect her daughter from the Lycans while also protecting her own blood from the Vampires

Santa Clarita Diet – Netflix Original – Sarcastard Review

Santa Clarita Diet – Netflix Original – Sarcastard Review

Sarcastard Review of the Netflix Original The Santa Clarita Diet starring Drew Berrymore and Timothy Olyphant.

The series is about Drew Berrymore becoming what is essentially a zombie. And though she initially tries to hide it eventually her husband and daughter have to become involved to help keep it a secret. As well as trying to keep her fed so she doesn’t lose control of herself.

Thor Ragnarok – Teaser Trailer Review – Sarcastard Reviews

Thor Ragnarok - Teaser Trailer Review - Sarcastard Reviews


New review of the Teaser trailer for Thor Ragnarok released by Marvel studios. Starring Chris Hemsworth, Cate Blanchett, Jeff Goldblum, Tom Hiddleston, Mark Ruffalo, Anthony Hopkins


Description of Movie from IMDB:

Thor is imprisoned on the other side of the universe and finds himself in a race against time to get back to Asgard to stop Ragnarok, the destruction of his homeworld and the end of Asgardian civilization, at the hands of an all-powerful new threat, the ruthless Hela.


Thor Ragnarok is the third Thor movie and seems to have some elements of the animated movie Planet Hulk.

Selena Gomez’s 13 Reasons Why – Netflix Original Series – Sarcastard Review

Hello and welcome to Sarcastard Reviews. Today we’ll be talking about the first half of Netflix Original Series 13 Reasons Why. I’ve just watched the 7th episode out of 13.

So to start with the story is very intriqueing. For those who don’t know it’s about a week after a high school girl has commited suicide. And with something like suicide everyone is wondering what happened. In this case the girl who committed suicide has created a set of tapes explaining what happened. Originally from the trailer I thought she was going to give 13 tapes to 13 different people but what really happens is she gives a complete set of tapes to someone and and they listen to Hannah, the girl who commited suicide list off all the people who wronged her in this high school.

The show starts with her friend Clay who also had a big crush on her getting the tapes. It’s obviously a big surprise and as the show’s quiet nice guy he’s wondering why he would be on the list of people who caused her suicide. He slowly listens to the tapes and the show is full of flashbacks of Clay and hannah’s relationship as well and I gott say the lead actors Katherine Langford as Hannah and Dylan Minnette as Clay really do make you feel all the feels. You see the various hardships that Hannah went through and how Clay struggled to tell the girl he had the huge crush on how he really felt. As Clay listens more and more to the tapes and learns about the people who harmed Hannah he gets more upset.

One of the first things to come to minid when wathcing the show is how great the dipiction of high school is. And by great I mean accurate. It’s probably the most realistic high school I’ve ever seen. They really do a great job of showing the bullying of Hannah and of Clay as he learns more about who hurt Hannah. There’s also a mysterious conspiracy about what’s going to be revealed later in the tapes and who already knows about what’s revealed on it. And hannah set some rules about the tapes that make people have to listen to them completely and pass them on to the next person. And there may be an old friend of Clays that is helping Hannah out postumously.

The acting is also great, the two leads can definitely bring out the emotions. And the supporting actors are very solid. There’s some dream sequences from the lead that can be a little distracting at first until you get used to it. Kate Walsh also does a great job as the grieving mom. I also thought this show would be a lot of teenage angst and just some anti bullying but it’s so much more than that and done really well. The only thing ‘m not too sure about is how secretive the main character Clay is with other people and his parents about his relationship with Hannah and the tapes, he just keeps saying they were work aquantiences. And I’m not sure why he doesn’t at least try to talk to someone else about what’s going on.

Showing how hard bullying and suicide can get, family and friends wanting to assign blame and avoid blame being putiiing on themselves. The flashbacks do a great job of showing relationships and at this point in the show we still haven’t heard Clay’s tape so there’s a mystery as to why he is getting this group of tapes. There’s also a group of students trying to prevent Clay from finishing the tapes and we don’t know who hasn’t and has listened to the tapes. There’s also some real humor throughout. Not sitcom humor or fake laughs but organic humor that comes from relationships. And it does make you laugh. Overall it’s really a great show, very entertaining. It’s character and story driven with great acting and writing. I will be watching the rest of the show very soon and doing a review of the second half tomorrow and I highly recommend anyone who’s interested in this type of show to watch it.

Thank you and have a nice day.

Sarcastard Review – Stephen King’s IT – Trailer Review


Hello and welcome to Sarcastard Reviews. Today we are going to talk a bit about the teaser trailer that was just released for Stephen King's IT. If you haven't had time to see the trailer yet there is a link to it in the description below. I am a big Stephen King fan, I've read as many books of his as I can and have watched all the adaptations of his work. I will eventually watch this theatrical adaptation of IT, however based on this trailer I am not excited about it.

For starters it looks like instead of following the format of the mini-series where we switch back and forth between the main characters as kids and as adults they seem to just be focusing on the kids. I looked at the cast list and there are no adult versions of the characters listed. There's also no indication of the adult versions in the trailer. This leads me to believe that the plan is to tell the story of the kids as a first part, then the story of the adults as a sequel. And this has me annoyed more than anything. For one we already know how this movies is going to go and I will talk spoilers here if anyone needs a warning although the book and the mini-series have been out for awhile. So the part with the kids ends up with not really a lot happening. They get away from pennywise the clown and the bully but that's it. The kids don't defeat anyone and most people know pennywise is going to come back so there's not much in that ending for the audience to go away with begging for a sequel.

It seems like they are banking on people liking the characters enough to watch a sequel but that could be a mistake when the cast is made up of child actors. No offense to the kids in the movie but child actors don't have the experience or training to carry a movie like this. You can see it in the trailer when the kids are trying to be intense and amp up the suspense and it just doesn't seem to be working. There's one scene which is actually a pretty creepy looking scence where the kids are looking at a slide show of family pictures and pennywise takes over the projector, making it go faster and faster so it's practically a movie. And out of the family pictures an image of Pennywise slowly comes into frame. And it is a good scene but the problem is the reactions of the kids is just not very believable. Richie has asthma and his reaction of shaking his head in fear and taking a puff of his inhaler looks like something from a kids play, not a major motion picture. The girl playing Gretta had a great reaction but it was fleeting and the actress playing her does have a lot of acting experience so maybe she will pull of a good performance.

I was a fan of the first mini-series. It doesn't hold up very well but Tim Curry's performance is amazing and it was nice to see some familiar actors like Harry Anderson and John Ritter do horror, even if it was TV horror. And it looks like the studio is putting a lot of faith in the Pennywise character. Played by Bill Skarsgard who does have some acting experience in things like Hemlock Grove and Allegient. Of course he didn't talk in the trailer and the best part of Tim Curry's performance was his delivery of lines like "We all float down here". Tim Curry was spot on and maybe they don't show the new pennywise talking because they know comparisons will be made and it won't hold up to the Tim Curry performance.

But as I said I'm a sucker for Stephen King and I do hope it's good and it's just a teaser trailer, but this definatley did not get me excited just mostly curious. I know Stephen King has been talking about how good it is and I want to believe him but he also didn't like the Shining and thought Maximum Overdrive was going to be a masterpiece. And as much as I love Emelio Estevex, that movie ain't no masterpiece. My prediction for this movie is going to be that it makes slightly less money than the Mist when it came out.

Well that's all for now.  Thanks and have a good day.

Sarcastard Reviews – Logan


Logan - Sarcastard Reviews

Starring Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart

Welcome to sarcastard reviews more reviews you can go to www.sarcastardreviews.com if you're watching this on YouTube the puppy in the picture is Vader, he is half Husky,  half lab and all my mine.

Logan was released in theaters March 3 and to put it bluntly it's a good movie of one of the main selling points of this movie is the R rating and they definitely use it to their advantage and viewers approval.  Seeing the red band trailer you'll see the part where Patrick Stewart swears a bit and you might think that might be just put in there for shock value but in actuality there is a lot of swearing throughout.  Patrick Stewart is kind of a potty mouth.

One thing to point out if you're looking for big set pieces with overblown CGI and big explosions there's not that much to this.   There is action, it is very gold with more grounded fights which you need with all the slicing and dicing with the claws.  They really bring out the violence something again if you have seen the red band trailer you've seen some of the violence but it's just a small sample of what's actually in the movie.   It does get violent it does get graphic,  and it does get good.  And another thing to point out is if you're looking for cameos there aren't any and you know that the main characters that are Logan, Patrick Stewart as Dr. X and there's Caliban but as far as any previously known mutants that's it, there's no flashbacks to explain why there are no more mutants, they just talk about what happenedmand they really don't go into detail.

Patrick Stewart as Dr. X is suffering from something that they don't go into details about.  They just say he's suffering from something that's causing his brain to degenerate and because of that he has seizures that're very dangerous to everybody around them.  And he talks about something that happened  in another town in the past.  People died, mutants died but there are no details.  They never show it in a flashback to explained what happened.  The story is joust told to us briefly and with little detail.

Logan at this point is suffering from something, and again they don't go into detail.  He believes that it's the Adamantium inside him basically poisoning him,  like lead poisoning.  In the movie he is very slow to heal, he has to strain to heel, his claws come out sometimes only partly.  He has permanent scars and he can heal but has to strain to do it.  They don't explain all the scars and I like the idea of not going back with a bunch of flashbacks.

There is on issue that I do have with the timeline of the movie though.  Logan takes place in 2029.  In Days of Future Past which took place much further into the future than Logan there were a lot more mutants around and Logan didn't have Adamantium poisoning.  So the events of Days of Future Past where Logan went back to fix things actually made things worse?  It doesn't take away completely from a great movie, but it is a distraction since they just made an effort to fix the timeline and now they mess it up again.  They are constantly rewriting and overwriting their own history.  They also do some different things as far as adding a Deadpool short to the beginning of the movie, and not having an after credits scene.

In the movie Logan is a limousine driver hiding out in Mexico, in this world the X-Men are legends.  With comic books and figurines made in their image.  People actually post sightings of the Wolverine, or someone who looks like him.  Which leads a Mexican woman to contact him for help.  She has helped some children escape from an illegal medical facility.  These children are the result of experiments with women inseminated with Mutant blood.  Which goes with the final credits scene from X-Men Apocalypse.

There is the typical hesitation to help.  At this point it's a little old because we know Logan is going to get involved to help out.  Though in this movie a lot of the hesitation is because he's protecting Dr. X.  But of course Charles Xavier wants to help.  This is where they get involved with the girl in the movie, she is the X-23.  There is a great action scene when they all meet.  Where we are introduced to the bad guys, the reavers.  A group of men who have been mechanically enhanced.  It's great to see these men be afraid of the little girl, even before the action starts.  They escape and start what is essentially a road trip movie with a lot of action.

One small issue with the movie is the main bad guy, Pierce.  He's a good villain but not fleshed out because half way through the movie he is replaced by the X-24 and a Dr. who is in charge of the experiments.  The X-24 was a good surprise but it would have been nice to have a more fleshed out bad guy.

The road trip leads them to a family headed by Eric LaSalle from ER fame.  It's a great family building moment between the 3, Dr. X, Logan, and the X-23.  There are some difficulties on the trip because of Dr. X's dementia he is losing control of his abilities which are very dangerous when unchecked and there are a few examples of this.

Again it is not the big CGI explosion fest.  The action is good and very graphic.  We're talking about limbs being cut off, decapitations and more.  Very violent and definitely worth the R rating.  There are some comedy moments, most with Patrick Stewart.  The acting with Hugh Jackman and Patrick Stewart is great.  This is a perfect movie for both of them to end their runs as these characters.  The action scene to end the movie is very well done as are all the action scenes.

8 out of 10


Collide – Sarcastard Reviews






Directed by Eran Creevy

Starring Nicholas Hoult, Felicity Jones, Anthony Hopkins, and Ben Kingsley

Hello and welcome to Sarcastard Reviews for more reviews go to www.sarcastardreviews.com Today we'll be talking about Collide which was released on February 24 and stars Nicholas Hoult,  Felicity Jones,  Anthony Hopkins,  and Ben Kingsley.  To start with,  Holden and Jones play Americans even though they are both British and they have to hide the British accents with American ones which doesn't make a lot of sense in this movie because they easily could have changed the main characters be British.

The only point of them being Americans is a a speech by Hopkins later on in the movie regarding their American prejudice.   Holt already has lots of experience with doing an American accent in the X-Men movies, Mad Max, and he was in Warm Bodies so he has lots of experience.   Felicity Jones doesn't and you can tell she's British, you can see it coming through a few times.   She's not in the movie that much so it's not as apparent and when I say that she's not in the movie that much even though she does get second billing she's really just in the beginning and think about Michelle Monaghan's character in Mission Impossible three it's a very similar way of doing things,  she starts out as the love interest and her and Nicholas Hoult have this relationship.

The movie started by showing the relationship with a montage and jumoing to different points throughout the relationship, them meeting and moving in the and them being in love and then it's discovered that she has kidney disease that she actually knew about that now they have to deal with her needing dialysis.  But because they're in Germany and they are foreigners they are not covered for health insurance and  she does get dialysis but she actually needs a kidney transplant which that insurance covered so the only solution they can come up with this they need to go back to America again.  Because they are  "Americans" and but the cost is around $250,000.

Nicholas Hoult, when he first met Felicity Jones he was dealing drugs for Ben Kingsley and Ben Kingsley works for Anthony Hopkins.   So Hopkins is the big bad of the movie, he's a very evil druglord, he's very pretentious and stuck up and he humiliates Ben Kingsley.  There is a good scene in the movie were Ben Kingsley wants a promotion essentially, Anthony Hopkins shoots him down by in the most humiliating way possible.  He not only says no but also is very insulting to the Ben Kinglsey and he's correct but is also insulting.

So Ben Kingsley early in movie wants Nicholas Holt todo more for him.  Felicity Jones doesn't want to date a guy who's a drug dealer so he quits and we fast-forward to all these issues with her health and meeting in Germany and now Nicholas Hoult wants to go back to Ben Kingsley for a job, a big job because he wants the big payday he wants to pay for the new kidney Felicity Jones needs.   Kingsley because of Anthony Hopkins attitude in reluctance to being a partner with them wants to rob Anthony Hopkins.

So that's basically the setup of the movie, from there on you get the typical "robbery goes bad" and there's a big chase, there's multiple car chases, including one on the autobahn.   There are plentyof shootouts with Nicholas Hoult running from Anthony Hopkins drug dealer characters and his soldiers.  Essentially they're all nameless they all have very few lines, if any.  Anthony Hopkins does have some good scenes where he's basically chewing scenery he has some great monologues, one about torture, one about how much he hates Americans, and then one about how much he hates Ben Kingsley himself, and they're really well done and I think he was having a lot of fun with this role.

Ben Kinglsey's character is crazy and unpredictable.  He's pretty unusual and the unpredictability does add some humor and tension.  There are some good fight scenes with Nicholas Hoult he's essentially playing a car theif, so without martial arts or fighting training.  But he is able to get the best of them even though these are mob soldiers, and essentially they work for the drug dealers.  They were hired so they should know some skills but here's this car thief who is essentially just a kid out of college who stole a few cars and he is out fighting these guys and a outlasting these guys.  So there is definitely some believability issues.   The car chases are good especially the one on the autobahn.   It's very fast, it's not cut to pieces so that you get these quick 10 second cuts, its well choreographed.

There is not a lot to the story, there's barely anything really.  It is something we've seen plenty of times,   just the guy is in love with a girl, he wants to do one last job, it goes wrong and then he has to make good throughout the rest of the movie.   Felicity Jones is in the beginning,  Hoult goes out and does his thing, gets involved in the robbery and then you don't see Felicity Jones again until the end when they are both in the final act.  Dealing with the consequences of what happened.  Overall the acting is good with the four leads, but Felicity Jones is listed as a lead. I would put Anthony Hopkins and Ben Kingsley above her as far as being the stars of the movie and they do a good job.  Anthony Hopkins is very intense and sinister.  Not like Hannibal Lecter sinister but he is pretty good, Ben Kingsley's crazy which is very funny and also unpredictable which leads to some tension.  Nicholas Hoult is good but pretty much void of a lot of personality that's one of the biggest issues with the role.  There is not much to it other than he loves Felicity Jones.  That's really all there is to his character so he seems to be having fun in the role.  There is lots of action, lots of fighting but there's really not much to it.

Felicity Jones is the same,  she's the pretty girl that the lead is in love with and there is not much more to her character than this.  Really feels like a movie that could have gone straight to video or straight to Netflix but it may be it was sitting on the shelves for a little while and they released it now because Feliciy Jones has some heat on her from Rogue One and that's really all it seems like at this point.   It's not something that will make a lot of money in theaters and it's not something that any of the actors are going to be to excited about doing.

So I can rate this a six out of 10. It's slightly above average because there is some good acting from Hopkins and Kingsley.   very fun to watch those guys have fun on the screen and there are some good action seems there are some good driving to their knowledge any special in any way but also not bad not cut to pieces do not terribly choreography if that's a word and their entertaining so just slightly above average 600 4 o'clock for this and other movie reviews go to www.sarcasticreviews.com thank you

Pete's Dragon 2016

Pete’s Dragon Review

Pete's Dragon 2016
Pete’s Dragon (2016)

Pete’s Dragon (2016)

Starring: Oakes Fegley, Wes Bentley, Bryce Dallas Howard, Karl Urban, Oona Laurence, Isiah Whitlock, Jr. and Robert Redford

Directed by  David Lowery

From Walt Disney studios this version of Pete’s Dragon is well done and does manage to pull at the heartstrings a bit.  The kid that plays Pete does a great job of playing opposite a CGI effect while the CGI effect does make for a very realistic looking dragon.  It really helps make Elliot the dragon very likeable that he acts like a playful dog in a lot of his moments while also showing some personality while on his own.

Bryce Dallas Howard is a widow raising an 11 year old girl and talking marriage with Wes Bentley who owns a lumber yard.  At least I think she’s a widow as far as I can tell that’s not expressly explained which is my chief complaint with this movie, the lack of detail with characters.

Bryce Dallas Howard becomes really attached to Pete with little explanation.  Karl Urban is the villain but not an overly bad one.  He just wants to become famous by capturing a dragon like we all do.  There’s hints that his character and his brother played by Wes Bentley have some sibling rivalry and Karl is jealous because Wes owns the lumber yard and Karl just works for him but again it’s not explained.  There’s also a backstory with Robert Redford actually seeing Elliot years before but again very little detail.

When he’s around Robert Redford is great.  In fact all the actors are great. Oakes Fegley who plays Pete certainly pulls at the heartstrings when he’s just trying to get back to his pet dragon.  The girl that plays the daughter of Bryce Dallas Howard’s character is a good actor.  Elliot is a cute dragon, the CGI is good and the story itself is fun to watch.

Definitely recommend as a rental.  7 out of 10.

Sandy barely changed for Danny – Grease

We  bristle when someone says they don’t watch Grease because they take umbrage with the changes Sandy (Olivia Newton-John) needed to make in order to impress Danny (John Travolta).  But the reality as we see it is the situation was the other way around and Danny was the one making the sacrifices to impress Sandy.

To start Sandy was not just trying to impress Danny she’s also trying to impress the Pink Ladies.  They were the ones making fun of her mannerisms and appearance during the Sandra Dee song.  Not Danny.  And Danny never asked her to change, he wanted to date Sandy the way she was, it was Danny’s friends that made things difficult by putting her down.

Essentially the “change” Sandy made was a makeover that was done in a day.  She didn’t do it just to be with Danny she also did it to fit in with the Pink Ladies and the T-Birds and it was a change that easy could be reversed.  She changed because she didn’t like the crowd she did fit in with and wanted to fit in with a different crowd.  Not just to impress Danny.  And she had support from the Pink Ladies in doing this, she wasn’t going against her friends interests.

On the other hand Danny’s change was more significant and was just for Sandy.  He went through numerous sports before he found one that he could letter in because he thought that would make Sandy happy.  And he made this change knowing that it was an interest the other T-Birds did not share and would mock him for.

So Danny put more effort into his change than Sandy did, he did it just for her while Sandy did it to fit in with the crowd, and he did it with no support and facing ridicule from friends while Sandy did it with support and not risking ridicule from people she would consider friends.

Please consider this the next time you want to roll your eyes and complain that Sandy had to “Change for her man” she didn’t.  Also it was the 50’s, get over it.